Reflecting on My 6 Months in Canada

As I sit down to write this, I’m so overcome with thoughts and emotions that I’m struggling to type them on the page fast enough. I’ve been back stateside in the PNW for a few weeks now, with plenty of time to reflect on the first half of the year that I spent with my boyfriend in his hometown, Montréal.

For those that don’t know, 2020 had me considering two big moves abroad, either to Luxembourg for graduate school or Montréal for a new job. Obviously, as the world imploded in too many ways to count, neither ended up happening and in fact I spent half the year separated from my boyfriend due to the ongoing U.S. – Canada border closure.

**I know many of you are in the same boat, my heart and sympathies go out to anyone who has been separated from loved ones throughout the pandemic. May we all be reunited soon.

The end of the year saw extended family exemptions for unmarried, cross-border couples like us and we promptly applied and I found myself Montréal-bound (somewhere I’d never been before) on Christmas Day.

I’ve done a bit of musing and reflecting here on my time there, from the weather, to apartment hunting and the French language. Today though, I find myself introspective as the world slowly opens up and I gear up for another phase in life. Yet, at the same time, I’m quite sad that my time in Montréal has come to a close (for now).

Of course a large part of my despair is due to the fact that, I’m yet again, looking at an indefinite separation from my partner, but that’s not the only factor (but it is the most important one of course!).

Arriving in the midst of a pandemic was, to put it lightly, not ideal. I mean, between a mandatory two week quarantine (thankfully at home), arriving late in the evening in the middle of winter (and thus unable to get any sense of my surroundings), and being new to the area, I was quite thrown for the first couple of weeks!

On the drive from the airport my boyfriend tried to point things out and explained the various bridges connecting the island, but since I’d never been to Québec or Montréal I couldn’t really place anything. I then had to wait two weeks in the house without any sense of place. Quite disorientening let me tell ya!

Anyways, once quarantine safely finished and I gladly ventured out into a Québec winter, everything still felt a bit “off”, as it has been for the better part of the last 18 months.

I dealt with a lot of culture shock over how people treated the pandemic there, where restrictions received much more pushback than anywhere else in Canada. Coming from Seattle, where until recently, masks were required in all public spaces, including outdoors, and most people took social distancing seriously, it was SO shocking to see people outside without masks, especially during the winter surge.

I also saw way more improper mask etiquette in Québec. And anytime I saw someone coming out of a shop they would immediately rip the covering off their face in frenzy like they couldn’t do it fast enough. LOL.

That’s not to say anything negative about Québec or Québécers in general. I loved my time in La Belle Province and would go back in a heartbeat, it’s just the period I was there was, again, to put things lightly, a bit odd.

Legault seriously fumbled the response time and time and time again, which led to people quickly tiring of back-and-forth restrictions. The strict lockdowns (where we couldn’t even buy gloves at the store…tell me how that is not essential when it’s negative 20 Celsius out?!) and being the only region in North America with a curfew was quite a toll on everyone’s mental health. To make matters worse, restrictions were lifted a few times only to be slammed back into place just a couple weeks later.

Add that to the fact I didn’t know anyone (not that we could really see people outside our house) and was pretty reliant on my boyfriend, it’s no wonder I spent some time feeling out of it.

However, that’s in the past and Québec has been doing much better than a lot of states regarding vaccinations and I’m thrilled for everyone!

Okay, whew that’s not what I wanted to focus on here, just wanted to provide context.

In the end though, I made a lot of nice memories to make up for the not-so-nice circumstances during my time in Québec.

Since indoor activities and socializing were off the table most of my 6-month stint, we went outside. Like a lot.

Now I know what you’re already thinking, aren’t I already an outdoors girl? Well yes, but like we REALLY kicked it up a notch. Especially when you take into account that it was winter for most of my time there. CANADIAN winter. If you don’t follow me on Instagram or haven’t checked out my other Canada posts, then you’re missing out. Seriously, it’s a full blown Winter Wonderland up there from December – March.

Did that deter this PNW nature-loving mountain girl?

Absolutely not!

We went outside for a minimum of an hour a day, no matter the weather, only turning around if it was like, below minus 25 or an intense wind chill. I learned to appreciate walking, running, hiking and park-bench-sitting in the snow. Québec will forever be where I fell in love with winter and discovered it doesn’t have to be doom and gloom for half the year!

I also discovered another big city, Montréal, that I’m actually fond of (y’all know I’m not a city girl) and could actually see myself settling in, one day. We adventured a bit around the area, visiting places and seeing things even my boyfriend hadn’t before.

On a career note, I finally had the freedom to continue building this blog (even if it’s been sporadic), started freelancing in earnest and have had quite a few things published of late, thank you very much!

The province was just starting to open when I left and I only experienced a part of what the region has to offer, but I still enjoyed it so much. And now that we can see the end of the panini in North America, I can’t wait to get back and see everything in full force!

Another factor in making me feel a bit off-kilter was the fact that I always had the fact that my time there was temporary in the back of my mind. It’s weird half putting down roots only to know you have to pick up mid-year. It was very unsettling and while I love traveling and hope to live and explore numerous places in my lifetime, right now I’d love nothing more than a home base for more than a couple of months.

I mean, we moved 3 times in that short stint, only finding something with true long-term potential (for my boyfriend anyways) in the last couple of months. I felt very untethered and like my life was constantly up in the air.

I’m still not exactly sure what the next 6 months to a year will bring (I have somewhat of a plan worked out, but not writing about it until everything is ironed out), but my time in Canada was definitely some of the most uncertain. Between trying to get this damn freelance writing career off the ground (things have finally started “working out”, whatever that means!), no permanent home and knowing I had to leave, it’s no wonder I felt a bit strung out there come June!

Looking back, I think the only regret I truly have is just not being more present and enjoying it more. I developed some low-grade (sometimes intense) anxiety over the past year and a half, and it often interfered in my life and relationship. As mentioned before, we still had some wonderful, wonderful times that I wouldn’t trade for the world. However, the anxiety consumed me at times and I often felt I wasn’t nearly as present as I’d have liked to be, as worries about the short and long term future were never far.

Heck, I still don’t really know what the future holds, but I’m more at peace with it now and I hope to bring that energy with me into the next years to come.

How is your 2021 so far? Feeling optimistic or apprehensive about the future? Perhaps a bit of both like me?!